I joined the lunchtime minyan at work today to say Kaddish for him. It was an emotional experience, supported by my friends Ken and Eitan, and in the quiet reverent atmosphere of prayer that Len himself enjoyed.
This evening I have invited family and friends to sit in my home and reminisce about Len. We will probably light a candle, read a poem, and look at old photos.
I missed the opportunity to share with my Israeli friends because I sat shiva in Melbourne. I am looking forward to taking another step on the path of remembrance and honouring his name.
This is a comment on my father's blogspot - that was made 2 months ago, and I only discovered it this afternoon as I was preparing for this evening:
Alan,
My name is Albert Oaten. My mom, Mira, adored your dad for his personal devotion and care of her sickly 3 month old colic son 46 years ago- that would be me.
She has often told me about your dad - he came over to their house personally - realized there was a problem with the formula the hospital had given me, changed it, and followed up to make sure all was well. He was a naturally caring person, and a friendship was born between Len and my parents.
He and his wife and 9 year old son - that would be you - even visited us in California many years later.
She was saddened to see that your father had passed, and wanted to contact you and tell you about her memories of your father. His memory and spirit are alive and well in people like my mother and now me to some extent.
Sincerely,
Albert
I will now recite some short poems about death and dying that I find very moving.
When he shall die
Take him and cut him out in little stars
And he will make the face of heav'n so fine
That all the world will be in love with night
And pay no worship to the garish sun.
~William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
~Kahlil Gibran
Because I could not stop for Death,
He kindly stopped for me;
The carriage held but just ourselves
And Immortality.
We slowly drove, he knew no haste,
And I had put away
My labor, and my leisure too,
For his civility.
....
Since then 'tis centuries, and yet each
Feels shorter than the day
I first surmised the horses' heads
Were toward eternity.
Emily Dickinson
El Malei Rahamin (A Hebrew poetical prayer for the dead)
Transliteration of "E-l Malei Rachamim"
E-l malei rachamim,
shochayn bam'romim,
ham-tzay m'nucha n'chona
al kanfay Hash'china,
b'ma-alot k'doshim ut-horim
k'zo-har haraki-a mazhirim,
et nishmat Yisrael Arie Ben Baruch Hartman
she-halach l-olamo,
ba-avur sheb'li neder etayn tz'dakah
b'ad hazkarat nishmato.
B'gan Ayden t'hay m'nuchato;
la-chayn Ba-al Harachamim
yas-tiray-hu b'sayter k'nafav l'olamim,
v'yitz-ror bitz-ror hacha-yim et nishmato,
Ado-nay Hu na-chalato,
v'yanu-ach b'shalom al mishkavo.
V'nomar: Amayn.
Translation of "E-l Malei Rachamim"
O God, full of mercy, Who dwells on high,
grant proper rest on the wings of the Divine Presence -
in the lofty levels of the holy and the pure ones,
who shine like the glow of the firmament -
for the soul of Leonard Julian Hartman
who has gone on to his world,
because, without making a vow,
I will contribute to charity in remembrance of his soul.
May his resting place be in the Garden of Eden -
therefore may the Master of Mercy
shelter him in the shelter of His wings for Eternity,
and may He bind his soul in the Bond of Life.
God is his heritage,
and may he repose in peace on his resting place.
Now let us respond: Amen.
Len's body is gone, but his legacy lives on in me and my family. Yehi Zichro Baruch (May his memory be blessed).
